Married to a Bodybuilder
I wasn’t always married to a bodybuilder, it just kind of happened. He fell in love with a hobby and a lifestyle developed. Now once or twice a year I share him with a gym, trainers, more trainers, and a world that I will never quite understand.
To be fair, he does come to me every time he wants to compete to discuss whether we can handle another physique competition, specifically our marriage. After this last competition, I told him I would divorce him if he did another show. That was my visceral reaction after enduring another emotional roller coaster ride of competition season. Was I serious?. At the time yes. Now nine months since the last one, nope. He is eating like a human again and his horns have been filed back down. So we will stay married and our marriage will survive to see another year.
This article is not meant to be taken this the wrong way. I am so very proud of my husband and the amount of discipline and dedication it takes to get your body down to 3% body fat. My elbow fat doesn’t even get that low. I’m at a cool 35% right now and I’m pretty content if I can reach into my closet and my “skinny jeans” fit. The purpose of this post is to shed some light of what the other half of the equation- the spouses go thru when married to an ultra-disciplined, boiled chicken eating, 3% fat kind of person.
The Good, The Bad & The Ugly
The Grocery Game
Expect to Purchase HUGE, as in astronomical amounts of chicken breast, tuna, spinach, and eggs for your spouse’s diet. People will look at you sideways at the store when you throw 5 bags of chicken and frozen spinach in your cart. Thank the lord self-checkout is now a thing. Shake n’bake will cease to exist along with any other “normal” way to prepare chicken. Now the only way you can prepare chicken is to boil and dry grill until it’s depleted of all flavor and deliciousness. PS. Salt also becomes a bad word in your house, deserving of the death glare at times.
Seeing your Spouse in a New Light
Unfortunately, at some point, you WILL walk in on your spouse ( husband in my case) shaving parts of his body you didn’t know needed shaving. And yes, he will ask you to “get that spot he missed.” You will walk away feeling conflicted and questioning if you will ever be able to look at your husband with the same longing ever again. In addition, you will also wonder if you’re going to end up being one of those women whose husband had a lifestyle choice change halfway thru their marriage.
Posing- When you walk into your closet and find your hubby in a banana hammock doing his best Vogue impression and smiling like a serial killer. Please resist the urge to laugh. Trust me…lesson learned
Your competitor will be the biggest a**hole in the world then turn on a dime. They will have moments where they realize they have been devils and kiss the ground you walk on, just to flip again ten minutes later. The moods will eventually have you questioning your own sanity. When you ask what’s wrong, expect the usual growl of “FINE!” The moodiness really isn’t their fault, Their bodies are basically eating themselves for fuel.
Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder?
The spouse will basically live at the gym, which is OK at this point because as we discussed earlier, we really don’t want them around at this point anymore anyway. Which leads me to my next subject SEX. Their Testosterone levels are on overdrive, either because of supplementation or other reasons. Therefore in addition to being moody little buggars, they are moody, hungry and randy. You can either go with the flow and enjoy the ride (pun intended) or fight the good fight for the six months leading up to the big show.
Invest in Dark Linens
I so lovingly named my husband George Hamilton (see pic) By the time they get to show, they will eventually give “Tanning Mom” a run for her money! Invest in a pair of dark sheets, you’ll thank me later. After the show and after all of the tanning applications, it takes days to wash off!
Is it Worth it?
YES…despite all of the above reasons, it is worth it. When it is all said and done and your spouse is on stage happily beaming with their overly white teeth you know it was all worth it. Crying tears of joy and pride because that is your overly tanned lovey up there and they will be eating cheeseburgers and donuts with you shortly.
It is now September 30th, 2018 and my hubby is now training again for the Arnold 2019 in Ohio. Just this week I bought my first haul of spinach, eggs, and chicken…Such is the life of the wife of a bodybuilder! I will once again, be in the audience in March cheering him on!
This post may contain affiliate links where they author earns a commission if you decide to purchase anything from those links. See full disclosure.