New Years, the time of year when introspection and self-reflection are set on overdrive. That is what brought about this post “10 Lessons for my Daughters.” Analyzing and thinking about what changes are needed, inside and out and what little life lessons I would like my kids to take away from me and my style of parenting (free range with a dash of helicopter.)
As parents, we are always trying to instill little snippets of advice into our kids. Whether these little tidbits of knowledge are practical like passing down a family recipe or impractical like calculus (which I have yet to need as an adult.) We are just trying to help them out as they mature and navigate their own lives. So I decided to put a few of these lessons for my daughters to pen or rather to the cloud in the hopes that maybe just maybe I can impart some of this age-earned wisdom, that I have gained over the years from living and learning.
10 Lessons . . .
Take Care of your Skin
Unless you are fortunate to have an unlimited beauty budget later in life and will have plastic surgeons on standby you had better wear sunblock now. The damage you do in your youth is really hard if not impossible to reverse. Take it from me a child of the ’80s where baby oil and iodine were common necessities in the summer. Sunspots and wrinkles take root in those early years and the habits you develop early will stay with you and prevent latter damage.
No, I don’t mean emotionally, heartbreak is inevitable and a lesson in itself. I’m speaking literally, physically. Lift weights, do push-ups, kick-box, do anything that will build muscle. For three reasons;
1) You never want to be that woman that has to ask for a man to carry her dog food out to her car, you just don’t (unless you are 80 then it’s ok)
2) It prevents osteoporosis and injury, wrap those bones and joints in muscle. Plus shrinking is not cool, especially if you are already vertically challenged like your’s truly.
3) It just feels better – You will sleep better, your self-esteem will improve and you will be an example to other friends.
Learn How to Accept a Compliment
There is nothing worse than when hearing a compliment and then bashfully denying it. Own your worth! It is ok to say, “Hell yes, my hair looks good today thanks for noticing it took me 30 minutes!” or “Thank you, I really worked hard on that proposal!” You never hear a man denying a compliment, do you?
Make someones day and spread the joy! You never know what someone else is going thru. So go thru your day lifting people up, tell someone that they have kind eyes or a great smile. It will make their day as well as yours!
Don’t Hurt People’s Feelings and Don’t Tolerate People that Hurt Yours
Yes, in every type of relationship people will disagree and squabble. Couples will say things unintentionally hurtful, but when relationships become toxic have the ability and fortitude to recognize that and put an end to it.
Listen to your Intuition
That nagging voice that tells you to not park in a dark parking garage alone at night, or when meeting someone for the first time and the hair on the back of your neck
Sex is NOT a Bad Thing
Newsflash- Sex is great & Sex is fun! Sex will make or break a marriage. Never overestimate or underestimate the power of sex. Use your “power of the p” for good only and be smart about it. It’s a gift from God, don’t give it away to just anyone, you will regret it later. But you can still have fun (listen to your intuition!)
Keep your Old Love Letters
You will need that shoebox of old letters when you are postpartum, exhausted, or some other stage in your life. You will be having a breakdown for some ungodly reason and the old love letters will remind you that you weren’t always a Hot Mess.
Learn how to Say ” I’m Sorry”
If you want to stay married or maintain any kind of relationship you are going to have to learn how to properly validate and apologize. Yes, sometimes you will have to apologize even when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt you are right. It is not a sign of defeat it is a sign of maturity. You will need to do this with no debating, no excuses, and a smile. While the other person is gloating or relishing in your apology just take your thoughts to your last vacation. This too shall pass and next time it will be their turn.
Learn one Recipe and Make it your Signature
This one recipe will follow you to the grave. The one time you mess it up you will never live it down, you will hear incessantly “Mom remember the time you tried to put nuts in your meatloaf, ugh?” And no matter how many times you change it you will still be known for your famous _________! So make it something you can live with FOREVER!
After all, is said and done my daughters, I hope you take some of these lessons to heart, they may serve you well but in the end …
You do you my boo’s my loves.
I would love to hear any words of wisdom you have for your children! Leave me a comment below!
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